Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Boys...explained

"What is the matter with men?"
"Okay, first off, we are told to stop crying by the age of, like, 3, and then every time an adult male leaves the house, he says, "you're in charge," but your mom's still cutting the crust off your bread, so deep down inside, you know you can't possibly be in charge, 'cause you can't even make a sandwich. Then at a certain point, you start to notice girls who aren't your mom, and you want them to like you, you know, but they don't usually go for the normal social cues such as being tackled to the ground so then you decide to give her a gift, but she laughs at the rock you brought her, even though it's the coolest rock you ever saw and it has all kinds of glittery stuff on it. Anyway, let's just assume for a minute that you work your way through that minefield and you actually get a woman to notice you. Then what happens? Your guy friends turn on you, they start calling you names...But we know we would die in a ditch without women, so we keep trying. "

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